A Day in the Life (Of Little Winky)

Now that Winky has his perverted blog he thinks hes the shit. Well thats bull shit, I can summarize the events of my day just as easy as that goof. Thats all he does, summarize shit we already know and add stupid shit to it. Well now its my turn, heres my story. A day in the life of the little guy that makes every day worth living.

So Winky decided to wake up at 8 today... as fucking usual. Well hey the least I can do is piss him off by being rock hard for the next half hour. Lets see if he balls up and goes back to sleep, maybe I'll drop it to 15 if he hits that snooze button.

Scratch that, this guys determined today. Whatever at least he'll wash me for the first time in the last 3 days. Does he really think that rubbing shampoo all over me is going to make me clean. Shampoo is for hair, not whiskers that used to be pubes.

Um Yeah, you didn't tihnk you were gonna get to pee in the shower today did you Winky? I'm gonna be hard for at least another 20 minutes so better luck next time you big homo. Seriously do you even pay attention to me? All I want is a girl to gently stroke me and all you do is study for your stupid biology test that was last night. I mean shouldn't you know this stuff, you are a biology major... aren't I biology? You better put yourself out there this weekend and try to get some pussy or else I'm going to ruin you.

Yeah I'm still hard and you still have to wash your feet. Don't even think about touching me. I'm sick of your shit Winky and I'm not having any of this today. Seriously, until you get a girl to touch me I am going just sit here and annoy the fuck out of you. I'm going to itch at the most inconvenient times and get hard you are sitting on the cambus with hot girls all around.

Ok, it's been 25 minutes and I'm tired of poaching all of your blood. I'll give some back so that you can do good on your stats test today.

Now it's time to get dressed. Um... What the hell are you doing Winky? Put those whitey tighties back, thats right, I need to breathe too. I'd recommend the 8 ball boxers. They are smooth, nonabrasive, and it makes me feel young again. There ya go, you scratch my back and I'll scratch yours.

That feels great, alright now it looks like Winky is getting something to drink. I only caught a glimpse but it looked like a can of Monster. Doesn't that stuff have chemicals that make your me smaller? Maybe that was just a rumor from elementary school. Maybe it wasn't. Maybe Winky doesn't love me anymore. Maybe I have to show him that I'm mad at him. K, I'll do that.

Wow these boxers are awesome, note to self, make Winky buy more cool boxers that make me feel good. Exxxxxcellent, Winky is riding the bus over to the BioScience Library to study. If the conditions are right I think I can pull this off. I'm going to give Winky a NRB (No Reason boner). He thinks theres no reason for it but there always is, you just have to look hard (pun intended). Game plan for now is to get rock hard right by the IMU so that Winky has to try to Texas Tuck before he gets out at the Pentacrest in front of hot girls.

Damn Winky is getting smoother. It's almost creepy how quickly he flipped the elastic on me. This is really uncomfortable but I've gotta hand it to Winky, he got me good. Whatever, I'll leave him alone for a couple minutes and let him get some studying done.

30 minutes later Winky is on the computer doing biostats problems. Winky stop being a fag and look at hot girls at facebook. Seriously, how is you studying formulas that they give you on the test going to help you bone hot girls? Not at all, girls don't like formulas they like weeners and boners. Nice, those girls are hot dude. Maybe you should talk to that girl sitting next to you. Even though shes a 4/10 she looks like she has tiny clown hands. Those could be cool in a weird fucked up kind of way. Annnd she has the same book as you! Shes studying for the same test as you. Damn small world huh, it has to be fate that she has a vagina and is in your same class and is studying right next to you.

Whaaaaaaaat? You're not gonna talk to her? You lame piece of shit what if she has a question about a problem on the practice test? What if she just broke up with her boyfriend and needs weener right now. Ok that was a stupid and improbable idea but you could probably help her out. Girls suck at math anyways and I bet shes dying for you to tell her that you raise it to e to find the CI.

If your not gonna talk to this broad then I'm gonna talk to my buddy Rectum and put you into a world of hurt. Thats right, theres no bathroom in the bioscience library. I'm gonna make you walk to Phillips Hall you dickless pussy. Damn its kinda cold outside, good thing these undies are warm and cozy. Too bad I shrink anyways. Maybe Winks should just stop shaving me every 5 days with that stupid pink shaver thing.

I think I'm going to get half hard so that I piss Winky off when he's trying to poop. What a great idea, not a full blown boner but instead an anti-boner that will make peeing a big hassle. Mission accomplished, we should be in the bathroom in like 30 seconds.

OMG wtf is that smell? Is that yack? It's fucking 12 o clock, why would someone be yacking at 12 o clock? Jesus Christ a kid is fucking yacking in the toliet. Great there are only 2 stalls and I need to rid myself of yellow #5. Winky, we should get the fuck out of her man. This isn't our place. Wait you don't know any other bathrooms? So what if we have to walk 5 minutes to Macbride hall, I can't deal with a guy throwing up into a toliet while I'm doing my business. Ok fine, I'll stop trying to piss you off by getting hard at inconveneint times as long as you get the fuck out of this bathroom as fast as possible. Deal.

Sweet, alright Winks you seem like a pretty good guy. I understand where your coming from, you need some space and I'm totally cool with that. I'll give you some space for the weekend you know, just so we can keep this relationship going. But just an FYI, when you are done with Thanksgiving Break I expect you to get out there and get some pussy. But let's not get ahead of ourselves. I kinda like you Winks, I'll leave you alone for the rest of the day. Good luck on your biostats tests.