The Urchin

Ever wondered what the sperm of a Sea Urchin look like? Ever even stopped to consider that other animals have sperm too? Me neither. I guess maybe at one point in my life I was an immature kid obsessed with dick and fart jokes. I guess maybe I may have considered that animals have sperm too. But ever since visualizing the scene of a woman fucking a horse presented in 40 year old virgin, I haven't thought too much about animals sperm. Until this morning.

Woke up around 7 with a big stupid boner that I didn't know what to do with. Tried to think about old people and shit so I could pee in the sink before going down to eat but that didn't work. Finally I just decided to jank in the shower. Janking in the shower is fucking boss. I've only done it like 10 times in my life cause I thought it was kind of disrespectful to the act of janking, but that philosophy has since been amended. I wasnt even horny I was just sick of this nagging boner, and I needed to clear my head for my big test at 5:30.

Got on the bus and headed over to Biology Building to go to lab. This lab was some type of analysis of a procedure we performed last lab. I figured we'd be in and out, after all we had a big test later that night. I walk in the room, sit down, and shot the bull with my lab partner for a little while. Eventually I wondered wtf we were going to be doing today because on the chalk board was all this shit about looking at eggs being fertilized under the microscope. So I got up and went up to the front table where all the materials we use to perform the lab are located. I see a standard sized bucket with fucking urchins in it. Urchins are the bane of my existence. They do no one any good, and that's including other plants and animals, not just humans. Anyways, there are like 5 purple spiky urchins in the bucket.

Class gets started, we talk about where we are sitting for the exam and what to bring. Then the teacher, [lesbian bud smoker with a butch hair cut(non-discriminatory, only for visualization purposes)]Katherine, decided to pick up an urchin and start talking about how they procreate. She then picks an urchin up along with a syringe of 5M KCl and proceeds to inject the urchin in the bottom squishy part with the KCl. She said that the KCl will shock the nervous system and make it bust its load, either sperm or egg, all over the petri dish that she placed it on.

I'm sitting there the whole time picturing a couple tiny eggs, dripping out of the bottom of the urchin, completely out of sight from the whole class. While I'm sitting their visualizing this normal, appropriate thought, Katherine starts freaking out because it's busting a fat nut all over the petri dish. At this point my memory gets a little sketchy as a result of my frenzied state. I could not possibly fathom this much sperm coming from this small of a creature. For a comparisons sake, The amount of sperm that came from this perverted, sick creature could have filled up a shot glass to the brim. I'm talking milky sperm, whole milk with the cream on top. This stuff looked exactly like the man juice you and I are familiar with.

This little guy is the little engine that could. I only aspire to be able to bust a load as big as him.